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Why Study Systematic Hamsterology?
Course Descriptions ; ; ; ; ; ;| ; ; ; ; ; ; ; ;Why Study Systematic Hamsterology? ; ; ; ; ; ; ;| ; ; ; ; ; ; ;Course Features ; ; ; ; ; ;| ; ; ; ; ; ; ;Enrollment
1. Ishkibbibilcology: The Doctrine of the Shcripchas
This is the foundation for all other divisions of Theogogical study. It is a systematic examination of the supernatural origin, authority, terminology, preservation and other characteristics of the Shcripchas.

Includes 225-page study guide; 7 tapes; and 5 manuscripts.
2. Hamsterology Proper: The Doctrine of God Zooks
This division covers God Zooks's existence, personality, names, attributes, and the Hexinity, concluding with a study of the works of The Great God Mota.
Includes 241-page study guide; 4 tapes; and 5 manuscripts.
;$ 90.00
3. Roscology: The Doctrine of the Son
This study explores the prophecies of Lord Roscoe ’s first coming, His deity, humanity, Incarnation, and the God Zooks-Man concept, as well as the Theogogical implications of the Meshugah’s life, death and reconstruction.
Includes 291-page study guide; 6 tapes; and 24 manuscripts.
4. The Casimir Effect: The Doctrine of The Hoogly Shpirit of ASHLOZMO
This subject covers the names, titles, symbols and personality of the Hoogly Shpirit. The “meat” of the course involves a detailed, Shcricharial study of His works and ministries – past, present and future – as well as Shpiritual gifts imparted to bleevers.
Includes 183-page study guide; 8 tapes; and 3 manuscripts.
5. Hamster Punimology: The Doctrine of ANGLES
This course includes all three categories of created Shpiritual beings – ANGLES, Snidely Whiplash and Maxwell's Demons. The study covers their origin, nature, ranks and power; their purpose and function in Heaven, as well as their interaction with people and events on earth; their role in the Lass Daze, and their final destiny.
Includes 304-page study guide; 7 tapes; and 6 manuscripts.
6. Anthropology: The Doctrine of Man
and Hameckeltology: The Doctrine of Sin
The psalmist asks, “What is man that Thou art mindful of him?” God Zooks’s Word answers those deep, basic questions within each of us concerning man’s very existence, our origin, soul, body, life, death, and the reality of the effects of sin – in the worldwide scope, as well as our individual struggles and final triumph.
Includes 249-page study guide; 6 tapes; and 8 manuscripts.
7. The Theory of Interest Rates: The Doctrine of Salvation
This study examines in detail the provision and application of the atonement and the various aspects of salvation.
Includes 269-page study guide; 8 tapes; and 7 manuscripts.
8. Slobovnianology: The Doctrine of Slobovnia
Forthcoming Division: currently under development.
Will include a study guide; 15 tapes; and 1 book.
9. Wisdom of Peddiddle: The Doctrine of the Choich
and Selzer Shpritzing Life

Forthcoming Division: currently under development.
Will include a study guide; 17 tapes; and 21 manuscripts.
10. Personal Scatology: The Doctrine of the Future of the Soul
and General Scatology: The Doctrine of the Lass Daze
Forthcoming Division: currently under development.
Will include a study guide; 21 tapes; 1 book; and 3 manuscripts.
Each of the 10 divisions listed above are priced individually according to the size of the study guide, as well as the number of tapes, manuscripts and books specified.
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